new post coming . . . NOW!

Posted: April 20, 2009 in note from zee author
Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

Okay, so I’ve put off writing an entry long enough! It’s time to put my peg down. That’s right, I said peg. As some of you may or may not know: I am a Somalian pirate. That’s just how I roll, matey.

Anyways, onto the heart of the matter! What to write about . . .

The “20 Things About Me” series is on an indefinite hiatus. I love that phrase, ‘indefinite hiatus’. Rolls off the tongue quite nicely. Say it. Almost sounds like a medical term.

docPatient: Give it to me straight, doc. Is it cancer?

Doctor: Sir, I’m sorry to inform you that it’s much worse than cancer. You have what’s known as an indefinite hiatus.

Patient: oh. my. god.

.

(You see, these are the kinds of weird thoughts and conversations that go on in my head 24 hours a day. Some say I’m crazy. Others say I’m crazy. Me? I think it’s a combination of both. Mixed in with a touch of crazy to boot.)

So, since I’m not listing any ‘facts’, I’ve been trying to decide what to post. A punny joke? Draw a picture? Talk about something in the news? Rant about relationships? With all these options at bay, there’s no way I was ever going to decide on just one; procrastination would surely get the better of me. So I’ll just start typing and see where that takes me. So here it is. Oh hai.

goldfish

If a toddler eats nothing but goldfish crackers all day, is he a pescatarian? Hmmm.

I saw two squirrels making sweet passionate love to each other today. That’s all I have to say about that.

Speaking of seeing things I would rather not have, I was driving down the road, just minding my own business. When all of a sudden, I spot something on the side of the road. What is that? A bench? And it looks like there’s something written on it! As I get closer I start to make out some words written on there:

bench

FUCK.

ugh. So unbelievably annoying. It happens a lot, too.

Anyways, rest assured the aforementioned topics will come back sporadically. The jokes, the poorly drawn pictures, all of it. I’ll even drop a ‘random fact’ about me right now, what the hell. I was the fifth Beatle. There, I said it. It was John, Paul, George, Ringo, and Otto Mann. Granted I wasn’t even born until after the band broke up, but I was there in spirit!!! I practically wrote all of Rubber Soul. Let’s just keep this between you and I, eh readers?

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Comments
  1. Doraz says:

    Glad to see the return!
    Squirrels, huh?
    Interesting vision in my head!
    Beatles…THAT WAS U?????
    🙂
    Welcome Back!

  2. Kimberly says:

    I love the word hiatus. I should use it more often.

  3. ispyu says:

    Ah…finally!
    We missed you!

  4. pirate eh? HAR HAR HAR

  5. pinnythewu says:

    I did have my suspicions about the piriate thing.

  6. sly0208 says:

    I say it again. YAY!!! 😀

    And thank you, too! 😉

  7. Susi Spice says:

    about bloody time, come on u soooo can do better than this…are u taking a blogbatical? ( I CAME UP WITH THIS WORD IF ANYONE STEALS IT I WILL HAVE YOU TAKEN CARE OF! in the Fat Tony sense!)

    thank you for your lovely comment on my blog 😀 hugs. u didnt reply to mon email tho! what is up with that!?

  8. S. Le says:

    Watch out for the US Navy! They’re gonna getcha!

    I hate it when the advertisers win!

    It’s about time you showed up. You must have a lot of posts saved up by now! Looking forward to reading them. Welcome home!

  9. planetross says:

    I try hard not to look at benches that have eyes … it’s just too creepy; mouths, noses, and ears are okay though.

  10. spamwarrior says:

    It doesn’t work unless you buy the product that bench advertises. That’s what I think. Just because you see something doesn’t mean you’ll buy it. It might mean that you’ll seriously want to break something. Benches with eyes? How tacky.

  11. gigidiaz says:

    I’m so freakin’ excited you’re back! The 20 facts I can do without despite how incredibly fun they are to read. But no more disappearances! Paint pictures and rant!

  12. mynooch says:

    Otto… I wish I could buy you a beer and a $12 dollar hooker with a question-able Adam’s apple..

  13. jruthkelly says:

    definite hi.

    so, it’s great you’re back. crazy is the only way to stay sane. just let us know if you’re going to ride the bus or take your lunch. that’s all we ask here.

    thanks for the kind vote of confidence…

  14. Otto Mann says:

    susispice is right, this isn’t my A material. It’s like C-, and that’s only because I cheated off the smart kid next to me.

    I will definitely be updating more often, all of you guys are awesome!!

    Thanks for the warm welcome, I can’t believe I was missed!

    awww. 🙂

  15. jcow81 says:

    I totally believe you on the beatles thing man. I was the 6th member of Wings. Hiatus does sound like a disease but it is probably because it is. A hiatus hernia is when your upper part of your stomach gets caught in your thorax. GROSS!

  16. mynooch says:

    Seriously Otto..
    I guess you are spending too much time at http://thenoz.wordpress.com/ … they were rated in the top 10 of all wordpress blogs..

  17. Susi Spice says:

    totally shameless advertising mynooch lol not happy just been on a blogroll 😛

    http://susispice.wordpress.com

    and its ok for me to do it cause ottomann owns my heart 😛
    hehe

  18. SexyGir says:

    Please do it right now. I love it to read something about this theme

  19. B says:

    dammit man, if you do it daily for a week , it’ll become a constant scutter

  20. leakelley says:

    Glad your back!
    And in usual form, I might add! Ha!

  21. Melissa says:

    I love it.

    love it, love it, love it.

  22. dmwright says:

    Welcome back! We missed you.

  23. krkbaker says:

    you are friggin hilarious. i get caught by those damn signs every time. be careful, they are not just on benches….
    welcome back,
    kim

  24. Stinky98 says:

    The numbers are not the right ones, but are used only by way of illustration. ,

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